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Marry Well & Often

August 25, 2012

Your aunt and I would like to give you a gift for the ages. “Marry well and often.” You heard it here first.

In October of 1989 my favourite uncle, Corb, wrote me a letter than included this sage wisdom. Seventeen years later he would attend my first wedding to my husband Dave. At the time of our wedding both my uncle Corb and my sister Parrish were in remission for their respective cancers. He was several years into a battle with skin cancer and she with brain cancer. By the time Dave and I reached our first anniversary they would both be within days of dying.

Parrish and Corb at our wedding

Each of our anniversaries since the first has been tinged with a small bit of sadness. My sister was to die a week to the day from then, and I spent most of our anniversary laying on our bed sobbing. It’s hard to pull off any kind of sexy anniversary celebration when your eyes are red and puffy and your face is covered in snot. There’s just not a g-string that goes with snot.


Now, this is not to say that all of our anniversaries are tragic maudlin affairs. No sir. We always go out for a romantic dinner and exchange clever and meaningful gifts. Dave’s really good at coming up with clever ideas for anniversary gifts. Our first anniversary I got a contract (on paper) promising to finally write me a love song. The sheet music for that song, titled Letter To My Wife (Per Contractual Agreement) is framed and hangs in our boudoir. For our third anniversary (leather) I got a card with a photo of Leather Tuscadero. This year, our sixth anniversary (iron) I got a rusted metal light-up sign in the shape of a 6 that I had been coveting. Oh. Yeah. I got a husband that listens when I talk, even if I never hear a word he says.

This year marks not only our 6th year of wedded bliss, but the 5th anniversary of both Parrish and Corb’s deaths. Their deaths are something that I honour each week when I ride as part of the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society‘s Team in Training Cycle Team. Every Saturday I’m up out of bed before sunrise and clad in Lycra (in public) riding with my team and helping to raise funds to fight cancer. This year I will be in Vegas riding 122 miles with my team. This is a huge physical accomplishment for me as a cyclist (and because I’m a couch potato at heart). It will also be an emotional ride as the route will be filled with family members and survivors of blood cancers rooting and cheering us on. Dave and I decided that we should do something special to celebrate this anniversary and my ride, so the day after my ride is over we will be meeting up with Elvis and renewing our vows before our friends and family. Dave will be wearing a custom bowling shirt with the logo of my dream restaurant, of which I think y’all will approve.

Sorry, we didn’t do engraved invitations this time. Maybe I’ll get around to that for the next vow renewal. Vegas has so many options to choose from and I plan to explore them all. I have married well. We will re-marry often.

Since I know y’all are dying to know where we’re registered, you can find that info here: http://www.castironbitch.com.

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